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How to get into the prone pasition
This was posted by a member, who will go unnamed for his own protection, on another forum. I thought you all would like it. It's hillarious, especially for us older shooters:
"You will not have any problem getting into the prone position. Just follow my surefire method! I have developed a very effective foolproof method for getting into the prone position. First I take two Tylenol and two Ibuprofen tablets. I also drink half a pot of strong coffee with plenty of cream and sugar. I lay out my extra rounds, etc., and stand at ease waiting for the range command. Upon the command, I just fall down. I roll around ignoring the pain in my knees and elbows as with fixed determination I flop around, establish a rock solid prone position, reorient myself so that I am actually facing the general direction of my particular target and prepare to fire. The coffee w/ sugar and cream is a great help in helping me to twitch around and gain the final perfect position that will allow me to methodically plunk my shots into the target. The Tylenol and Ibuprofen usually have kicked in so that I can ignore any pain in my knees or elbows and concentrate on the match. Sometimes I've been known to eat some M&M's during the match just to keep my strength up. Trust me, you come to the match and I will take you under my wing... I'll see to it that you get off to a really good start. You just let me and the other fellows help you. I'm sure you'll do just fine. Really you will. I'm sure of it."
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06-17-2009 12:49 PM
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Tonight i am out for shooting so i´ll test this method. Hopefully the ibuprofen will work!!!
Gunner, eventually men with wounded knee´s
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It is unfortunate that so many people think target shooting is not a real sport. They don't realize how physically demanding it is and how much concentration is required. I'll second the need for ibuprofen
and the aching joints. I'll pass on the coffee though cause I get excited enough on adrenaline. Must be the smell of burning powder in the morning
I could use a downer to keep the pulse from wobbling my sights.
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That's a fact, Publius. I'm not a big guy, so I have to work on my upper body strength for off-hand shooting. That, plus those boiling hot days when staying hydrated is a problem, days when it's 34F and raining, I'm constantly humbled by shooters older than me. My friend's treatise on prone position shooting had me laughing, but at the same time made me realize that I'm starting to go thru the same thing in my efforts to continue to enjoy this great sport. Hmm....two Tylenol and two Ibuprofen tablets. I've already got the M&Ms in my range bag.
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Hi,
i tested it and could say that its more pain-killing to have a glass of a good scottish single malt whisky after coming home. AUUHH!
Gunner
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I laughed at the text, and cried a little in sympathy. I know it so well, having just about given up muzzle-loading shooting because I can't manage the jack-in-the-box performance for loading and recover my position fast enough to actually aim the shots within match time-limits.
I still do competitive BPCR shooting, and am an ace at cleaning my Long Range Sharps while lying down. I would load and clean my muzzle-loaders lying down too, but the rules here don't allow it. This tilts the odd in favor of those with a fully-functioning set of knees. And let's not say too much about pills, otherwise we might end up with doping dests for the senior classes!
Patrick
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"Me. All the rest are deados!"
67th Company, 5th Marines 1st Sgt. Daniel "Pop" Hunter's response to 1st Lt. Jonas Platt's query "Who is your Commander"?, Torcy side of Hill 142, Belleau Wood, 8:00 am, 6 Jun 1918.
Semper Fidelis!

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I witnessed a guy at Camp Perry do just about the same thing. He was a very large man and literally fell forward into position. Needless to say, he had a lot of padding to fall on.
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John Kepler
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Youse guys got it ALL wrong! Getting down is easy, hell, it's just "falling with style"! No, it's getting up after the string that's the trick! When I get up these days, it's like someone making a pan of "Jiffy-Pop" what with all the cracking and popping of abused joints...all of which happens concurrent with all the serotonin and endorphins "The Zone" created washing out of the brain....Torquemada couldn't inflict that much pain!
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Thank You to John Kepler For This Useful Post: