This was posted by a member, who will go unnamed for his own protection, on another forum. I thought you all would like it. It's hillarious, especially for us older shooters:

"You will not have any problem getting into the prone position. Just follow my surefire method! I have developed a very effective foolproof method for getting into the prone position. First I take two Tylenol and two Ibuprofen tablets. I also drink half a pot of strong coffee with plenty of cream and sugar. I lay out my extra rounds, etc., and stand at ease waiting for the range command. Upon the command, I just fall down. I roll around ignoring the pain in my knees and elbows as with fixed determination I flop around, establish a rock solid prone position, reorient myself so that I am actually facing the general direction of my particular target and prepare to fire. The coffee w/ sugar and cream is a great help in helping me to twitch around and gain the final perfect position that will allow me to methodically plunk my shots into the target. The Tylenol and Ibuprofen usually have kicked in so that I can ignore any pain in my knees or elbows and concentrate on the match. Sometimes I've been known to eat some M&M's during the match just to keep my strength up. Trust me, you come to the match and I will take you under my wing... I'll see to it that you get off to a really good start. You just let me and the other fellows help you. I'm sure you'll do just fine. Really you will. I'm sure of it."
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