Please explain.

[Peter Laidler]

On a more humourous note Gill and others, can you imagine a scene in a local magistrates court where a bit of a jacks-the-lad is up before the beak to answer a charge of wearing a uniform in public, where it is alleged that he wasn't entitled to.

Judge: " Mr Iver Biggun......, how do you answer the charge of wearing your uniform in public when you have never served..."
IB 'Not guilty mu-lud....."
J: But you were wearing it, prancing about wearing it...., we have photos of you. Fancy uniform and awash with medals. What have you got to say......"
IB: Well, there's nothing wrong with dressing up me-lud, just fancy dressin' up nice for a change. Nice sunny day an' that sort of thing...., impress the crowds......, look the part........"
J:: Stop acting like a very silly boy Mr Biggun and start acting your age......... you can't just dress up in uniform wearing all those medals and fancy stuff, strutting around like you've deserved them or done something to deserve them.....
IB: Well They started it........
J: (snorting..........) What do you mean........, explain yourself man!
IB: Look at the trooping of the colour recently, they're ALL doing it...... the kids an' all your 'onour. There's more fancy dress there than a gay pride march and more medals dished out there than at the Olympic games, more gold and silver than an African tyrants bathroom fittings. Prince and princesses wearing this that and the other have never been in the Army or the Navy.
J: Mmmmmmmmmmm, see your point Ivor........ Case dismissed!