+ Reply to Thread
Results 1 to 3 of 3

Thread: Duck Joke

Click here to increase the font size Click here to reduce the font size
  1. #1
    Legacy Member Ken The Kanuck's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Last On
    05-08-2020 @ 10:51 AM
    Location
    Coquitlam
    Posts
    150
    Local Date
    05-23-2024
    Local Time
    08:44 PM

    Duck Joke

    Duck joke





    A duck walks into a pub and orders a pint of beer and a ham sandwich.



    The barman looks at him and says, "Hang on! You're a duck."



    "I see your eyes are working," replies the duck.



    "And you can talk!" exclaims the barman.



    "I see your ears are working, too," says the duck. "Now if you don't mind, can I have my beer and my sandwich please?"



    "Certainly, sorry about that," says the barman as he pulls the duck's pint. "It's just we don't get many ducks in this pub. What are you doing round this way?"



    "I'm working on the building site across the road," explains the duck. "I'm a plasterer."



    The flabbergasted barman cannot believe the duck and wants to learn more, but takes the hint when the duck pulls out a newspaper from his bag and proceeds to read it.



    So, the duck reads his paper, drinks his beer, eats his sandwich, bids the barman good day and leaves.



    The same thing happens for two weeks.



    Then one day the circus comes to town.



    The ringmaster comes into the pub for a pint and the barman says to him "You're with the circus, aren't you? Well, I know this duck that could be just brilliant in your circus. He talks, drinks beer, eats sandwiches, reads the
    newspaper and everything!"



    "Sounds marvellous," says the ringmaster, handing over his business card. "Get him to give me a call."



    So the next day when the duck comes into the pub the barman says, "Hey Mr. Duck, I reckon I can line you up with a top job, paying really good money."



    "I'm always looking for the next job," says the duck. "Where is it?"



    "At the circus," says the barman.



    "The circus?" repeats the duck.



    "That's right," replies the barman.



    "The circus?" the duck asks again. "That place with the big tent?"



    "Yeah," the barman replies.



    "With all the animals who live in cages, and performers who live in caravans?" says the duck.



    "Of course," the barman replies.



    "And the tent has canvas sides and a big canvas roof with a hole in the middle?" persists the duck.



    "That's right!" says the barman.



    The duck shakes his head in amazement, and says .. . .



    "What the f*** would they want with a plasterer??!"
    Information
    Warning: This is a relatively older thread
    This discussion is older than 360 days. Some information contained in it may no longer be current.

  2. The Following 2 Members Say Thank You to Ken The Kanuck For This Useful Post:


  3. # ADS
    Friends and Sponsors
    Join Date
    October 2006
    Location
    Milsurps.Com
    Posts
    All Threads
    A Collector's View - The SMLE Short Magazine Lee Enfield 1903-1989. It is 300 8.5x11 inch pages with 1,000+ photo’s, most in color, and each book is serial-numbered.  Covering the SMLE from 1903 to the end of production in India in 1989 it looks at how each model differs and manufacturer differences from a collecting point of view along with the major accessories that could be attached to the rifle. For the record this is not a moneymaker, I hope just to break even, eventually, at $80/book plus shipping.  In the USA shipping is $5.00 for media mail.  I will accept PayPal, Zelle, MO and good old checks (and cash if you want to stop by for a tour!).  CLICK BANNER to send me a PM for International pricing and shipping. Manufacturer of various vintage rifle scopes for the 1903 such as our M73G4 (reproduction of the Weaver 330C) and Malcolm 8X Gen II (Unertl reproduction). Several of our scopes are used in the CMP Vintage Sniper competition on top of 1903 rifles. Brian Dick ... BDL Ltd. - Specializing in British and Commonwealth weapons Specializing in premium ammunition and reloading components. Your source for the finest in High Power Competition Gear. Here at T-bones Shipwrighting we specialise in vintage service rifle: re-barrelling, bedding, repairs, modifications and accurizing. We also provide importation services for firearms, parts and weapons, for both private or commercial businesses.
     

  4. #2
    Legacy Member jon_norstog's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Last On
    11-01-2021 @ 12:41 AM
    Location
    Portland, Oregon
    Age
    79
    Posts
    582
    Local Date
    05-23-2024
    Local Time
    08:44 PM
    Ken,

    That's a good one! Can I use it in my act?

  5. Avoid Ads - Become a Contributing Member - Click HERE
  6. #3
    Legacy Member Ken The Kanuck's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Last On
    05-08-2020 @ 10:51 AM
    Location
    Coquitlam
    Posts
    150
    Local Date
    05-23-2024
    Local Time
    08:44 PM
    Thread Starter
    You betcha.

    KTK
    OFC

+ Reply to Thread

Similar Threads

  1. I can't tell if this is a joke....
    By happydude in forum Appraisals, Fakery, Dispute Resolution & Mediation Forum
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 08-04-2012, 11:05 AM
  2. Cowboy joke
    By John Sukey (Deceased) in forum The Watering Hole OT (Off Topic) Forum
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 04-24-2009, 03:27 PM
  3. US Navy Ithaca Model 37 "Duck Billed shotgun"
    By 442nd in forum Military Shotguns
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 03-11-2009, 11:24 PM
  4. Odd duck
    By JosephDerMauserSchiesser in forum Milsurps General Discussion Forum
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 03-25-2007, 07:54 PM

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts